I dreamt a dream to-night.

Actually, it was this morning; I woke up a little after 6 due to the death rattle of my door, got up about 6:20, then got up again around 6:40.

Then I went online until about 10:15 AM, and woke up at 11:50.

During that time, I had a dream where my family was in a van, heading on some road trip. We used to go collectively, in three or four families, so sometimes kids would float around different vans. Anyhow, in my dream our van was packed beyond maximum capacity, but still we trekked on. At some point, we were at a stop and I got a bloody nose. It was night, and as we were piling back into the van, my dad began to drive away while my sister and mom were still trying to get in. I don't understand why. There was a car behind us, but they could've waited. All I know is that he was endangering both their lives. My sister hopped into the shotgun seat, but my mom was running, one hand still gripping the door. I was shouting at my dad and trying to hurry my mom in, and she looked surprisingly calm, and finally she made it, and then we were on the freeway.

I felt really panicked. Then my mom passed out, and I began hunting for something, anything with a strong scent. I found some tiger balm, and as soon as I opened it she woke up, and she was having trouble pieceing together what had happened.

I think some time passed, but a little after, when we were all seated properly, someone we knew had hopped up on the back of the fan, was poking his head through the window (it was bizarre), and then joined us. We passed some cops, and I was terrified because we had three people more than the van could legally fit, but it was dark and I guess they didn't notice.

I thought it was a strange dream, but within seconds after waking up I began to feel like it had summed up my entire childhood, right there. I had spent most of it feeling those same emotions: furious at my father, worried about my mother, and afraid of the cops.

But, there was an ending.

There was a walkie-talkie involved with my uncle (the Chinese everyone's-an-uncle kind of uncle), and my dad was trying to talk to him but couldn't understand, and my mom handed it to me. Unknowingly, I cracked a joke, and the whole van started laughing. My mom explained to me what I'd said that was funny (it's probably not funny in real life, but it was in dream), and after a moment, I began to laugh, too.

For a second, it seemed as though there was nothing left to do.

And then I woke up.

I think that last part was really important. It showed that despite all the obstacles, in spite of all the fights we have had as a family, in the end, we were laughing. At first I thought "all's well that ends well," but it's not the end yet. Now, I think it's more symbolic of the ability to be happy; to have a sense of humor, and to be able to smile despite hard times.