?

the fuck is wrong with me, i took what i hated and made it a part of me.
shit, i don't like becoming precisely what i hate.
why am i here.
what the fuck was i thinking?

enough to hold you to the brightest of lights; to place you dangerously close to that sun. enough to acknowledge the flaws you can't ignore and recognize the cause of what's done is done. more than enough to put my name behind my ideals, and neglect my logic twice daily. enough to keep me looking for my lucy in the sky with gems, when i remember how you used to call me baby. enough to look in my mirror with detest for every tear you shed, regardless of why you wept. enough to curse any man who can't appreciate the depth of the ocean i swam till i ran out of breath. don't ever fucking question that; that's why we'll probably never get along.

i watched the children scurry in circles around a two-way mirror, worrying about which side of the glass projects the reflection clearer? i hear the whispers of the wind trying to get me to grin, gassin' me up about the love that i plucked and i've been stuck within. for every eclipse that stares at me from the other side of a paper cup of espresso--i light a match beneath a kettle, and for every set of lips that become attached and equipped with that program to seek success, i bleed my ethics out a slow drip. i know a man who met a woman, don't remember where, big beautiful eyes and light brown hair. she was from the burbs, he was from the south side of the city. (this was back when franklin avenue was still pretty.) two different worlds apart, but the world is just a small town.