i slept through the game today. then i woke up around 5:40. a minute later, still sleepy, i played my game and bageled her. felt bad, but my sleepiness was an emotion more powerful than my pity. my game took all of two minutes, and then i went back to sleep.

or, well, i tried. somehow i got involved in an argument between tiff and ryan, and i yelled at ryan from my position on the floor and then he challenged me to "bring it," so i got up and went over and i think i succeeded in intimidating him, for some time anyway, but then i didn't do much other than spend a few minutes standing there and occasionally punching him. and then it was about 6:20 ish and people were leaving and i decided i wanted to leave, as well. ryan offered me a ride but i opted to have my dad pick me up so that i could drive.

what a fucking mistake.

#)%*#)%@)* asshole.

whatever. got home and i wasn't really sleepy anymore but i went to sleep anyway because what else do you do when you're in a mood like that.

sleep it off, sleep it off. all you can do.

around 8:30 i woke up b/c the lady called me inquiring about volunteers for the anime expo and whether or not we could meet her thurs or something to help her bag stuff. and yeah.

CoatOfArmsMMzero: school is a bitch.

very well said.

and uh. i think i'm done. i could rant about what happened during the car ride, but i don't care to relive tiring memories at the moment. tired, that's what i am. i could be angry, but i didn't even feel angry in the car. i felt frustrated and really, really tired, and i could have socked him right then and there but it wasn't anger. it wasn't anger the way in the past i wanted to just fucking floor it and i wouldn't have cared if i had committed both suicide and homicide if i could just find a brick wall to ram into, and it wouldn't have mattered that i was dead if it would have just meant that it would have ended.

good verra, what a fucktard.

i even remember writing an entry about that. about that feeling, about getting so angry behind the wheel because he won't fucking stop yelling about all the wrong things, and the temptation to just accelerate and ram into whatever roadblock would stop the car first. i wrote the entry but it never published, and now i don't remember what i used to describe the feeling. it's not a frequent feeling, though...red-hot anger.

i didn't feel that today. i felt too tired, much too tired to put up with him.

and wow, i fell asleep like five times on the gym floor today. i borrowed jen's jacket as a pillow and jeff's jacket as a blanket. thank you. and i didn't get any homework done, but whatever.